This was the result of a silly challenge that made me sweat. Write a story
about cow tipping. Bet you can't! Well, I researched...and I asked Fox. He
knew! Then Te challenged us to be light hearted and happy, and I just got
all verklemmt! This is what happens when I am emotionally overwrought! Te -
I salute you! Paula - nuts, hear me? Nuts! :)

Disclaimer:If they were actually mine, do you think I'd waste my time
WRITING about them?

Thanks to: My betas did me proud and I love them...Frankie, Orithain and
Paula, please take a bow! Try to forget...one day, your lives will be
better!

NC17 as per usual. I only write smut and this is M/M with no redeeming
features. Don't read it if the idea of hot, sticky boys clinging together
doesn't please you.

Feedback: Yes please...

Spoilers: Possibly Terma...who really knows at this point?

Plot: What plot? :) Alex and Fox get fragrant!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Call of the Wild

by Dr Ruthless

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fox Mulder was tired. He was more than tired, he was totally exhausted. He
had only had 2 hours sleep out of the previous thirty-six, and it had been
an exhausting case. Here they were, deep in the heart of rural Virginia,
looking for werewolves at 3am. Sometimes he wondered why he did this kind of
thing. Surely he could teach, or work with battered wives, or tend a bar or
anything other than this! The ratty motel at which he and Scully were booked
did not impress him, but he was so tired he was sure he would sleep anyway.
He had just said good night to Scully and seen her to her door. Once again
he checked out her neat figure, pretty skin and aristocratic manner, and
wondered how come she was still single. He really liked her, loved her even,
but not in "that" way! There was only one person for him, and it was not
Dana Scully.

He unlocked the door to his room, moving slowly, stiff with tension and
fatigue. Not bothering to switch on the light, he entered the seedy room,
smelling the odors of disinfectant and old sweat that permeated the place.
Tossing his jacket in the direction of the bed, he stretched his hands up
behind his head and heard his back give a satisfying crack. A sound from
behind alerted him far too late to the fact that he was not alone.

There was a blur of movement seen from the corner of his eye, and then he
cried out as his shoulder was seized, he was spun around and shoved
backwards onto the bed, a heavy body following him down to knock the breath
from his body. Warm lips sought for his, and a soft mouth claimed him as a
hand fumbled for his belt and a lean, hot body writhed against him, sending
shivery tendrils of lust from groin to scalp. He struggled to fight off his
attacker and finally managed to hold him away from his mouth for a second.

"Are you crazy? What the fuck are you doing here? How did you find me? Don't
you know Scully is in the next room, and these walls are paper thin?" His
desperate whisper was met with a low chuckle as the intruder stroked his
jaw.

"I saw you this afternoon as I was driving through the town. I've been
waiting all bloody evening. Why did you stay out so late? Think of the fun
we could have had!" The voice was low, husky, gravelly and very sexy. Fox
Mulder felt a twitch as his cock recognized the man who was still lying on
top of him.

"Some of us have work to do, Alex! We can't all just lounge about doing
nothing all day!" He snaked his arms around Alex Krycek's neck, pulling his
head down and opening his lips for a kiss. He was just getting into it,
tongue searching the other man's mouth, body straining against his lover,
when there was a knock on the door.

"Mulder? Mulder it's me! Are you all right? I thought I heard you cry out."
Dana Scully's low voice cut through the mounting excitement, and he pulled
away from the sniggering Alex, getting up and going over to the door.

"Umm.... It's OK, Scully, I just slipped in the bathroom is all. The floor
was a little slippery. Sleep well." He tried to sound relaxed and sleepy.
Scully must have been satisfied with his explanation because she murmured a
'goodnight' and retreated back to her own room.

"God, Alex, you know you shouldn't do things like that to me. What if we
were caught? They'd arrest you and take you away. Please be more careful."
Mulder was once again talking in a whisper. Alex was still finding the whole
situation funny.

"That's OK, Fox, they'll never take me alive!" He grinned, white teeth
flashing in the still darkened room.

"Yeah, that's what scares me. I don't want it to come to that." Mulder's
tone was serious. Krycek arose from his position lounging on the bed and
came across to his lover, putting his arm around his waist and leaning in
for a long, slow, loving kiss. Mulder moaned and responded by cupping Alex's
ass and pulling him in hard to press against him.

The two of them remained, mouth locked to mouth, for some minutes, hands
wandering over each other as their tongues entwined and their erections
grew. Finally, separating for a second, Mulder took Alex's hand and led him
back to the bed. Sitting down on the edge of it, he realized in dismay that
the damned thing was not only very lumpy, it also creaked. He bounced
tentatively. It creaked like a pub sign in a gale. It creaked like the door
to Castle Frankenstein. It not only creaked, it groaned and squeaked too.
His heart sank.

"If we have sex on this bed, the damned bed is going to come more often than
the two of us put together. Fuck!" Alex smiled, wordlessly handed Mulder his
jacket and hauled him to his feet, kissing him quickly before leading him to
the door.

"I've always intended to study nature more closely." He whispered, "It looks
like now is the time to start." So saying, the double agent cracked open the
door, and peered cautiously into the gloom. "It looks clear enough. Let me
go first, and then if she sees us, you can say you were chasing me." As he
opened the door, Mulder quickly gathered up the comforter from the bed and
followed behind.

Stealthily, keeping to the shadows, the two made their way to the back of
the motel. All around them was farmland, and Mulder could see fencing that
stretched out of sight. He seemed to remember a horse peering over the fence
as he arrived this afternoon but could not be certain.

"Alex, I think I remember a barn or something over there. We could go and
check it out." The two of them climbed cautiously through the fence and made
their way over grass towards the dark shape on the skyline that might be a
barn. Partway there, Mulder caught up with Alex and grabbed playfully for
his ass, at which point they stopped moving and clung together in a
passionate embrace. It had been several weeks since Mulder had seen his
lover, and he wanted to climb inside his skin. His tongue sought out the
warmth of Alex's mouth, teasing the inside of his lips and then plunging in
hard to find and stroke its opposite number.

Standing there in the middle of a field, at 3am, Fox Mulder, tired as he
was, wanted nothing more than to make love to this man who was in his arms.
Their kiss grew deeper as Mulder turned his mouth to seal against Alex's
soft lips. He ran a hand down Alex's back searching for the edge of his
jacket and then moving up inside to feel the warmth of his lover's body.
Alex wore a soft, chambray shirt beneath his customary leather jacket, and
Mulder tugged at the back of it until it finally came loose, allowing him to
get his hand up inside it. Once there, he ran his hand over the other man's
back, relishing the play of the long muscles as he stroked and kneaded them.
His other hand dropped to cup Alex's butt, and as they continued to kiss, he
writhed gently back and forth, grinding against his lover.

Alex stood, head tilted back, offering his mouth to Mulder who was sucking
on his tongue as they continued to kiss. His arm was around Mulder's neck,
and he had thrust his fingers into the other man's hair, pulling the taller
man's head down to meet his lips. He had missed Mulder so badly. Earlier
that afternoon, when he had caught sight of Mulder and Scully as he drove by
it was all he had been able to do to wait until nighttime. He had tailed the
dynamic duo back to their motel and had settled down to wait. Now, with
Mulder in his arms once more, he wanted him. He couldn't wait to feel his
lover lying naked over him. His skin tingled in anticipation of intimate
caresses. His breath began to grow ragged as the longed for, familiar feel
of Mulder's body against his generated waves of prickling sweet excitement
up and down his spine. He groaned and closed his eyes, reveling in the
electric sensations they were generating between them.

Mulder began to push Alex's jacket off his shoulders. As their mouths
separated, Alex ran his tongue over Mulder's lips, down his chin and into
the crease between neck and shoulder, biting and suckling the soft flesh at
the angle of his jaw. He shuddered with lust at the sensual rasp of the
other man's chin, feeling the day old growth brushing against his own.
Mulder threw his head back and moaned his appreciation.

"God, Alex, I've missed you so much I kept waiting for you to call, or
e-mail, or leave me some kind of message, but you never did. It's been so
long. Don't do that to me again, please." He spoke quietly, but Alex could
hear the hurt and longing in his voice. Unsure what to say to soothe Mulder,
he contented himself with pulling him in for another long, sweet kiss,
nibbling his lover's lower lip before plunging his tongue in to taste,
tickle and tease.

"Are we far enough away that nobody will see us? I want to feel you naked.
Maybe we should go a little further." Alex spoke jerkily, his mouth dipping
into Mulder's collarbone between phrases. His fingers were busy, threading
their way inside Mulder's shirt to find and tug on his nipples as he gloried
in the taste of his lover's skin and the silken feel of it against his lips.

Sighing, Mulder opened his eyes and surveyed his surroundings. There was the
low building that he had noticed previously right behind him. The details
were impossible to make out in the dim starlight, but the black silhouette
of it stood out against the faint glow of the sky. Putting his hands on
either side of Alex's face, he pushed the other man back and indicated it.

"Let's go there, we won't be disturbed once we get inside. Nobody will be
able to see us, and we can take our time." He kissed Alex gently and then
gathered up the comforter, which had fallen to the ground. As he headed for
the barn, Alex fell in behind him and the two of them moved off.

Arriving at the building, which proved to be a wooden barn with an open end
to it, the two of them slipped inside and without further ado grabbed each
other. They clutched and moaned as they tried to erase the weeks of
emptiness that lay behind them. Mulder fumbled at Alex's belt, his shaking
hands making heavy work of things in his haste to find what lay beneath.
Finally, he got the belt undone and moved on to the buttons of Alex's jeans,
shoving them down over his hips as his prick sprang out of its confines.

Alex felt for the buttons on Mulder's dress shirt, opening them one by one
until he reached Mulder's tie. This he grabbed hold of, wrapping it around
his hand and tugging on it until Mulder began to gasp for breath. Still
holding on to it, he leaned forward to stop the other man's protests with
his own mouth, hauling Mulder in with it while he kissed him savagely, and
then jerking him down to a kneeling position before releasing his hold on
it.

In the near darkness Mulder could make out only the gleam of eyes and a
flash of teeth exposed in a smile. His hands busied themselves, pulling
Alex's jeans down. He slid his hands upwards from knee to groin, strong
thumbs passing over the insides of his thighs, pressing until Alex kicked
off his jeans. He muttered a muffled prayer that he would be able to find
them again, but as Mulder urged with sensual, clever finger strokes, he
threw caution to the winds and parted his legs, permitting his lover free
access to the sensitive areas between.

To begin with, Mulder concentrated on the scent of his love. He pressed his
face into the crisp curls that surrounded the other man's penis, inhaling
the sweet, musky Alex smell. His hand slipped between Alex's legs to probe
for the tight, puckered entrance, and his fingers worked it, dipping and
circling, causing Alex to throw back his head and gasp from the pleasure of
the sensations.

Returning his attention to Alex's cock, he licked the length of the shaft,
causing the standing man to draw a hissing breath between his teeth.
Mulder's tongue flicked and teased the sensitive ridge that ran around the
head, then he opened his mouth and circled it just for a moment before
ducking to engulf it in the warmth and wetness of his mouth. Finally,
angling his head, he opened his throat to take in its full length. Alex, who
was always vocal at these times, cried out, making Mulder chuckle and
causing vibrations that made his victim arch and thrust. He sensed that Alex
was very close to coming, and forestalling his attempts to grab Mulder's
head and push further into him, he drew back, making Alex swear.

Rising to his feet, he ran his hands under Alex's shirt, pulling it up and
off his lover's body, tossing it away and swooping in to claim his lips once
more. Long moments went by before the two broke apart, and Mulder stooped to
spread out the comforter on the ground. His clothes followed Alex's and
finally naked, the two of them sank to the floor, arms tight around each
other, bodies straining against each other as they kissed and writhed.

"Please, Fox, I need you. I need you to fuck me." Alex's voice was hoarse
with need, and Mulder laughed as he rolled his lover over, curling up behind
him to nibble the back of his neck. Alex groped for his discarded jacket,
and when he finally laid his hands on it he fumbled through the pockets
searching for lube. Deftly opening the tube, he squeezed some into his hand,
reaching behind him to apply it to Mulder's swollen penis. Slicking up his
own anus, he thrust himself backwards and guided the urgently twitching
member to press against his ass. Mulder gently thrust home, pushing his dick
slowly past the band of muscle until it slid sweetly into his lover's
silken, hot tightness. As he drove into Alex's warmth, he paused, and for a
moment they stayed still while Mulder fought for control, feeling his cock
throbbing as he teetered on the brink of orgasm.

"Oh, God, Alex! It's been so long. So long!" His voice broke as he tried to
convey the strength of his need for the other man.

"Come on, fuck me, fuck me now." Alex was gasping. He reached back to take
Mulder's hand, guiding it around to place it on his own, rock-hard erection,
prompting him to move up and down on him. As Mulder took up the rhythm, Alex
voiced his approval with muttered obscenities and tender words mixed.

There was silence, broken only by gasps and squelches, as the two men thrust
and strained. Finally, their motion began to speed up as their need grew.
Alex could feel Mulder's cock sliding in and out of his ass as his hand
worked on his dick, the movements becoming ever more spasmodic and urgent.
Suddenly, Alex cried out Mulder's name as he toppled over the top into an
orgasm so intense that he could not move. His joints locked up and his spine
arched as he shot his ejaculate into Mulder's hand. Seconds later Mulder
felt his own orgasm welling up as his balls tightened, and he shot his own
hot fluid into Alex.

For a while, the two of them lay panting, the sweat cooling on their bodies.
Mulder, still joined to Alex, reached around to pull Alex's face to him.
Finding his mouth, he explored it, soft, cushioned lips sliding over Alex's
as he expressed all the love he could not say to the man in his arms.
Gently, tenderly, he stroked Alex's skin, committing the feel of it to
memory, as they lay bathed in the warm glow of satiation.

A sudden noise filtered down through a fog of drowsy satisfaction that
surrounded the two men. Alex jumped, groping ineffectually for the gun he
had left in Mulder's motel room. Mulder, who had been very close to sleep,
suddenly found himself separated very abruptly from his lover as Alex rose
to a crouch and searched desperately for his clothing.

A fevered search ensued. Alex felt around in the darkness in the area where
he had dropped his clothes, and as his questing fingers laid hold of fabric,
he moved in the direction where he knew his clothing must lie.

He pulled on the fabric of his jeans, but there seemed to be something in
his way, something holding the garment to the floor. Thinking that they had
caught on a nail or something, Alex fumbled for the obstruction and with a
cold thrill of horror, found something hard and horny on his clothes,
pinning them down. He felt around the whatever-it-was, attempting to
discover what in the world it might be. As his hand traveled over the
obstruction, he could feel the change in texture as the hard, rough base
turned to soft hide covered in coarse hair. He jerked his fingers back in
confusion, but then cautiously stood up, hand outstretched to grope for
whatever obstacle might be impeding his access to his clothes. His open hand
met warm hide, and something flicked against his arm, causing him to jerk
back sharply.

"Fox!" His whisper was urgent.

Mulder had risen to his feet, and as Alex backed up, he felt Mulder's warm
body against his back. His arms slid around him as Mulder leaned forward to
whisper in his ear.

"What is it, babe?" Mulder pressed his lips briefly to the back of the other
man's neck, drawing away again as he realized just exactly how spooked his
lover was.

"There's something standing on my jeans. I think it's a cow." The whisper
was strangled, and Mulder had to forcibly restrain himself from laughing
hysterically.

"Can't you get it off?" There was amusement in Mulder's voice and Alex found
himself snarling as Mulder snickered.

Alex stepped forward and pushed half-heartedly at the cow's behind. It might
as well have been a cliff face for all the good he did. It remained,
immobile.

"I think it's asleep!" What am I going to do?" Alex's voice was plaintive.
He was picturing the long trek back to his apartment wearing next to
nothing, coupled with the need to get from his car into his apartment just
at the rush hour. He did not feel it was something an under cover agent
should be exposed to, except that exposed is what he would certainly be, and
under cover he most definitely was not right at this moment!

"It's going to be OK," Mulder soothed, "Find the rest of your clothes while
I think. There's something I used to do when I was a kid, but I have to get
myself psyched up for it first."

Alex felt along the floor, eventually finding his jacket, shirt, shoes, and
one sock. The cow remained in full possession of his jeans.

"Fox! We have to do something. What am I going to do without my pants? Help
me out here." Mulder was absently running his hands up and down the long,
lean lines of Alex's torso, from nipple to groin as he pondered. Finally,
after a pause, he pulled on his own clothes and drew Alex's face in for a
hard, brief kiss, sucking the other man's tongue in and nipping his
delicately carved lips.

"OK, here we go, I'm as ready as I'll ever be. I used to be able to do
this." He stepped up to the cow with an air not unlike that of a skilled
safe cracker. He felt his way around to the side of the creature and placed
his hands on it. "Get hold of your pants, and be prepared to yank them out.
This might not work, but I'll give it my best shot."

Mulder tightened his muscles, put his back into it, and heaved on the cow.
The cow promptly fell over. There was a pause, a crash, and a terrified
bellow followed by a cry of triumph from Alex who had finally captured the
lower garments he needed. Swiftly, he pulled them on, hopping up and down on
one leg as he donned them.

"Jeez, Fox! You have talents you've never shared with me! That's pretty
damned stunning!" Mulder laughed out loud and then hastily backed away from
the wildly flailing bovine hooves.

"Yeah! I have a black belt in Helo kiti. My feet are registered as deadly
weapons and when cows everywhere lay eyes on me, milk comes down their
noses!" Hastily gathering up their comforter, the two of them felt their way
to the door of the barn, pushing out past what seemed to be a complete herd
of cows.

"How do you suppose these critters managed to surround us without us
noticing? That's quite a scary concept." Alex asked once they had managed to
make the open field.

I don't know. Maybe it's because we were so into what we were doing. Maybe
it's dangerous to our health to go for six weeks without seeing each other."
He swung around, face alight with laughter, and gathered Alex up into his
arms again, running his hand down over Alex's ass as he glued his mouth to
him. His hand froze suddenly.

"Umm.... Alex!" The voice was carefully without expression.

"What is it, Fox?" Alex was engaged in running his lips over Mulder's face -
hand buried in his hair, tongue peeping out to taste eyes, temples and ears
as he browsed.

"I'm going to have to lend you a pair of pants unless you've got a suitcase
nearby."

"Nope. Didn't bring one. I wasn't intending to be away overnight until I saw
you, lover. Why do you ask? What's wrong?" Mulder's hands moved to cup the
bulge in Alex's jeans.

"Oh, nothing... You know they say that cow manure is good for making things
grow?" His fingers kneaded and stroked as he spoke. "Let's just say that if
I apply the substance that's on the seat of your pants to this, I'm going to
be more than satisfied!"
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