Title: Acrotomophile
Author: KMS!

Rating: PG-13
Classification: V
Spoilers: Tunguska/Terma
Keywords: Mulder/Krycek/slash

Summary: Mulder finds out about Krycek's arm

Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. Can't afford to buy 'em.
Characters lovingly borrowed from Carter/1013/Fox.

Author's notes: This has been kicking around in my head a while and with
the recent talk about 'gluing' Alex's arm back, well... ...and then I found
this word and it just reminded me of the boys so much! Um... This may be
a little twisted.
______________

Acrotomophile - A person who is aroused by the thought of having sex
with an amputee or by fantasizing about it.
- Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices


Acrotomophile
By KMS!
kmspider@aol.com

He hadn't expected to run into Mulder again. Not here. Not now. Not
after the disaster in Russia. Not after he had had his arm cut off, sans
anesthetic, making him feel clumsy and off-balance.

Their encounter now was more by accident than design. Alex had been in
Washington, casually leaving the warehouse after his meeting with his
informant, when low and behold, there was Mulder.

Shit! Shitshitshit! He didn't need this. But there was no way to avoid the
man.

Alex raised the gun in caution, trying to keep Mulder on the other side of
the room. But Mulder was having none of it. He took another step
forward. Alex shook his head in warning. Mulder kept coming until he
was right in front of Alex. Another step brought him closer still, invading
his personal space until Alex was forced to either step back, lower the
weapon, or shoot the dumb bastard.

Somehow Alex restrained his finger from twitching over the trigger, and
felt himself give ground. He was forced to retreat until he was backed up
against a wall. Mulder still followed, pressing close. But Mulder
surprised him when he made no move for the gun. Instead his hands went
to Alex's waist, holding him in place as he leaned close to Alex's ear.

"I like it."

Alex frowned, pulling his head back, almost thumping it against the
concrete, and stared at Mulder's face. Tooclosetooclose! Alex was
distracted by the look on Mulder's face. A look he couldn't place yet.
"What the hell are you talking about?"

Mulder reached up with his right hand in response, smoothing the palm
over Alex's jacket. The empty sleeve of Alex's jacket.

Alex's nearly dropped his gun in surprise. He stared hard into the hazel
eyes but all he could detect was rising excitement. His eyebrows rose and
he blinked in astonishment. "You... you LIKE it?" Then anger flared.
"Well, of course YOU do! They didn't cut off YOUR arm, you asshole!"

"No! It's not that. It's just that..." his voice trailed off. "God, Alex, it's
so... so..." Mulder's voice held awed reverence. He let his hand move
under the leather, skimming over Alex's shirt and chest and up to the
shoulder. Gently he eased the jacket off the shoulder, revealing the
truncated limb below.

"Ugly, you mean?" His face flushed with anger and embarrassment. Damn
Mulder for putting him through this.

"NO! Oh no, baby. It's just so... erotic."

Alex released a small, exasperated sigh, anger washing away in one breath.
"Mulder..."

But Mulder was ignoring him, too intent on revealing the mutilated flesh.
Swiftly he started on Alex's buttons, barely restraining himself from
simply ripping the shirt open and letting it fall to the floor.

"Did it hurt? Can you move it? Can I touch it?" Mulder's hand moved
down his shoulder, fingers lightly tracing over the stump. Mulder kissed it
and Alex jumped, sucking in a startled breath.

"No... No. I... no, it doesn't hurt. Well... sometimes."

Mulder kissed it again, tongue lightly touching the ragged flesh. Alex
almost sobbed with tension. And then Mulder kissed it again and Alex felt
a nervous chuckle start deep in his chest. "GOD, Mulder! I thought you
would be repulsed." His finger brushed over Mulder's cheek. "Instead..."
Alex took a ragged breath, "Instead, you have the curiosity of a child."

"But it's a part of you." He said it like it was the only reasonable
explanation in the world. Like saying that Alex had green eyes.

Mulder leaned forward and kissed the hollow in Alex's neck then followed
the smooth skin out to the stump again. Alex felt all the hairs on his body
stand on end. Mulder slipped his tongue into the cavity of Alex's armpit
and Alex jumped. Shit! How the hell could an armpit be erogenous? But
Mulder was touching him again, laving his tongue over the puckered flesh,
tracing over the scar tissue. "Can you flex it?"

Alex straightened his stump out. He heard Mulder give a happy sigh and
lean in to him. He could feel Mulder's erection pressing into his leg. The
gun fell to the floor with a clatter.

"Move it around."

Alex rolled his shoulder joint and he felt Mulder's cock leap at the sight.

"Oh god, Alex. I want you so bad."

Alex just stared at him. "I can't believe this! This is turning you on!"

"Oh, yeah," Mulder's reply was low and breathy.

"Christ, Mulder, you know you are a sick and twisted, little fuck."

Mulder's lips met his. "Yeah, but I'm your sick and twisted, little fuck."
Mulder reached for the buttons of his Levi's, parting them swiftly. Alex
felt himself harden as Mulder's hand slipped inside and caressed him.

Alex brought his hand up to the nape of Mulder's neck and pulled him into
a ferocious kiss. Mulder groaned into his mouth, one hand stroking him
steadily, the other lightly playing over the amputation. Alex felt Mulder's
hips rock forward, his cock straining to be free. Clumsily he reached
down and freed Mulder's cock. Mulder groaned again.

Quickly they divested themselves of clothes, tossing them carelessly onto
the hard floor to act as an impromptu bed. Alex sighed happily as Mulder
made slow passionate love to him. He had feared that no one would ever
want him again, that they wouldn't be able to see past his disability. Leave
it to Mulder to not only see past it, but to be turned on by the very thought
of it.
___________________

Afterwards they lay back on their makeshift bed caressing
one another. Alex had to shake his head when Mulder
continued to stroke and touch his stump.

"You know why they did it, don't you?" Alex hear Mulder
softly ask.

"Not really. Maybe they just wanted to make me a part of their club.
There was a whole group of them."

"No. They were trying to SAVE you."

"Save me?" Alex asked, incredulous. "By cutting off my arm? With no
anesthetic!"

"They thought they were saving you from the tests. If you didn't have the
small pox vaccination scar, you didn't get tested."

"How do you know?"

"The people who found me wanted to save me, too."

Alex shuddered at the thought. His beautiful Mulder, disfigured. One set
of those long tapered fingers gone. Lying in a decaying pile of flesh on the
forest floor. Alex trembled again.

"Did I tell you that I always wanted a peg leg? I don't know why. I guess
I just thought, you know, that people wouldn't expect as much out of me.
You know?" Mulder's fingers continued to explore the area, following the
outlines of the truncated flesh.

"My favorite show was 'The Fugitive.' My favorite books were 'Moby
Dick' and 'Treasure Island.' Be my Ahab, my pirate, Alex." Alex watched
as Mulder tongue skimmed over his lower lip, as if wetting it in
anticipation.

Alex kissed him again. "Why did you want to be disfigured?"

"I guess I just thought that it would be so much easier, you know? If
people could see your scars. See your pain. Then they could forgive you
for it. Make allowances. Not expect you to be the perfect child, the
perfect son. The perfect agent. If all your pain is on the inside then it's
invisible. They can't see the crappy childhood. The broken heart. The
tattered soul. The scars on your psyche. Part of me has been missing since
I was twelve. A part that I search for everyday. But people can't know
that just by looking at you. The loss of your soul, the loss of your
childhood is not nearly so obvious. So they expect you to continue. To
carry on. Even though you feel like you barely have the strength to get out
of bed in the morning. Sometimes it just seems so unfair."

Alex hugged him close, wrapping his one good arm around him, lightly
caressing him with his fingers. "Your right, Mulder. People look at you
and all they see is the outside. A handsome guy who seems to have it all.
Good job. Good looks. Intelligence. Wealthy family. From the outside it
looks like you have everything."

Mulder kissed him again. "And now I do, Alex. Now I have everything."

_______________________________________

The End

_______________________________________

People may become attracted to amputees for many reasons. These
include fetishes, vicarious sadism, low self-esteem, a legitimate excuse for
poor performance, respect for an amputee's adjustment to a handicap, need
to rescue and care for an amputee, and fear that this loss could happen to
them.
- Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices
_______________________________________
_______________________________________

Comments to:

schneidk@dmcsac.disa.mil



"You know, Mulder, you ARE Ahab."
"You know it's interesting that you should say that because I've always
wanted a peg leg. It's a boyhood thing I never grew out of. No, I'm not
being flippant. And I've given this a lot of thought. If you have a peg
leg or hooks for hands, you know, maybe it's enough to simply carry on
living. Bravely facing life with your disability. It's heroic just to survive
but without these things you're actually expected to make something of
life. Achieve something. Earn a raise. Wear a necktie. So... so... so, if
anything I'm actually the antithesis of Ahab because if I did have a peg leg
I would quite possibly be more happy and more content and not feel the
need to chase after these creatures of the unknown. "


'The Talk on the Rock'
--Quagmire





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